Teen Says She Refuses to Take the Blame for Her Mom’s Mistake

• An 18-year-old says that she and her mother recently attended a luncheon in which she briefly asked her mom to hold her purse and jacket
• The teen says her mother then left her phone at the event and has since been insisting that it was her daughter’s “fault” because she “gave her too many things to hold”
• The teen, who shared her story on Reddit, says her mother hasn’t forgiven her in days and has called her “egotistic” for not taking “the blame”

A teen says her mom says she’s “not able to forgive” her for a simple mistake — but she doesn’t think it’s actually her fault.

The 18-year-old detailed her experience on the Reddit forum “Am I the A——,” a place where platform users can go to seek advice about interpersonal problems. In her post, the woman explained that she takes care of a lot of tasks for her mother, who she said is “in her early 50s” and semi-retired. 

“I do the [paperwork for] rent, the insurance, the utility bills and even call the Uber for her when she needs it,” she said.

The teen then explainedd that she recently won a scholarship, and she and her mother attended a special luncheon for recipients — which is where she said the initial drama took place. 

She said that she asked her mother to hold her purse and jacket at the end of the event while she took photos with her school principal and counselors. Then, on their way home — “5 miles into the journey” — her mother realized she had forgotten her phone in the bathroom back at the event space.

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The original poster (OP) said that the family they carpooled with kindly took them back to the venue, and they retrieved the phone without issue. However, she noted that her mom then “started saying how it was my fault” because “I gave her too many things to hold.”

She added that her mother repeated the claim numerous times when they arrived back home, and even brought it up a few days later when they were having “a completely different argument.” 

The OP said that her mother accused her of being “egotistic” and self-centered, and that she should have “admitted” that the phone situation was her “fault.”

The teen added that now, days later, she overheard her mom tell her sister that she is “not able to forgive me” for the phone incident, claiming that the OP should be taking care of her and not the other way around.

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The OP, who clarified that her mother “is an independent lady who has worked her whole life and can do things by herself,” goes on to ask her fellow Redditors if she was the “a——” for refusing to take the blame for her mother’s mistake.

“NTA [not the a——],” said one person, adding, “And def get some distance from her.”

Another person added: “NTA. Your mom is making excuses for her simple mistake – all she had to do was just go ‘Whoops, my bad, thank you so much for taking us back.’ Well done on your scholarship, good luck with your work and hopefully you’ll earn enough to move out soon and get on with your life.”

“I think she’s setting you up to be her caretaker. You are her retirement plan,” someone else said.